DeSign of the Times

I've been trawling around BlogWorld today and have been pleasantly surprised by the number of interesting, amusing and erudite bloggers that there are out there. I suppose it makes sense. After all, people tend to do what they enjoy and enjoyment of something comes, predominantly, from an ability to perform that action to a certain standard.

The problem is, it's made me realise that I'm actually part of the common herd of writers. Sure, I have my moments but the reality is I am one of a great many. I could be content with that, I should be content with that but I just don't do content.

I'm a dabbler. I see someone doing something and I want to aspire to their ability. The trouble is I lack the application, inspiration and concentration to excel so enter into a circle of frustration and non-fulfilment that lasts until I latch onto another stimulation.

Take design for example: I can't draw a straight line and lack any ideas regarding design whatsoever. When I first discovered drawing programs, I was really chuffed that I could manipulate images and played constantly, learning Paint Shop Pro and even creating my own posters for the Quiz Nights I compère. I tended to adapt existing images but it was fun and the learning process was interesting, albeit frustrating.

I wanted to build my own website so registered a domain name and purchased some space. It sat there for 2 years with me occasionally thinking I ought to make a start but not really sure how. Then a combination of factors conspired to lead me down a path upon which I now precariously stand. A path which started with me creating my blog page and learning a little bit of HTML. That, in turn, inspired me to play with DreamWeaver and I now have sufficient knowledge of that to create a teensy-weensy web page. Because DreamWeaver is allied to PhotoShop, I am trying to make the transition to using that as my primary design program along with Adobe Illustrator.

To summarise, I know a small part of each of these sophisticated programs and languages but lack the means to learn further apart from within my own abilities and motivation. I have bought books, DVDs, even nice hardware like my Wacom graphics tablet but it really all boils down to skill and aptitude. The local Adult Education people run courses on really important subjects like 4th century BC Hittite Jardiniéres or Flower Arranging for Disabled Ectomorphs but do they do practical things like Web Page design? Oh no, far too sensible. Maybe it's the way I like to learn but I much prefer a human teacher rather than something that doesn't give me feedback, suggestions, criticism or stimulation.

I've got some of my Quiz Show posters in an album which can be viewed here and they've been well received. The trouble is, I know that they're pretty ordinary, indeed laughable, to anyone who has a skill or appreciation of design. Maybe that's the nub of the whole matter? My arbiter of success is recognition by those that can rather than those that can't.

Given that my efforts so far over the years have been far from adequate and that I am expecting to become a master of 3 incredibly complex programs and a programming language, I think that my best bet is to allow the gifted to do what they do best and come to terms with the level of ability which I presently have.

But then, when have I ever done the sensible thing...........?