In the Clegg with the LibDems

Today is my beautiful daughter's birthday. Where has 20 years gone? In that time I have watched her turn from my little girl into ............well, she'll always be my little girl. It's written into the Dad Charter.

Anyway, as I waited for her and my equally wonderful son to arrive this morning, I gazed idly out of the window. The lawns below, empty since the Bank Holiday MotorShow Extravaganza, were a scene of activity with crash barriers being put up and balloons inflated. Grateful as I was for Eastbourne Council's efforts to celebrate Zoe's 20th, I was a little puzzled until I noticed the 3 television vans and realised that there might be something more to this. Peering through my camera lens, I read the words "Lib Dems" on the balloons.

Was our candidate worthy of that much news coverage? Well, having seen him wandering around at the previously mentioned MotorShow trying to get noticed, I felt not. It could, surely, only mean the arrival of the leader himself! As I gazed at the various suits and posh birds looking important, I was pretty sure that "Scoop" Bassett was in prime position for some good photos.

Watching the balloons being readied was hilarious: should the LibDems come to power I really hope they get better at handling inflation than they were today. A steady stream of helium-filled balloons floated upwards interspersed with the occasional bunch. Have you noticed how we are becoming Americanised? The Yanks tend to have several bands, banners and about 3000 beautiful people holding placards behind their Presidential candidate whenever he speaks on camera. I saw one T shirt which , I think, said "Nick for Queen" and a very businesslike lady handing out placards. It was rather interesting watching the assembled faithful being shown what to do vis a vis placard holding - it's obviously more difficult than it looks!

"Right, let's get this straight - both hands like this?

"Yep, it looks even better with a placard"

"And ...........UP! Come on you chaps at the back, look lively"

Finally the battle bus arrived and I stood, finger poised over my shutter button, and the tension palpable. It was rather like the best Westerns when Lee van Cleef and Yul Brynner are waiting to see who draws first. The doors opened............. No Clegg, just some bloke with a camera, closely followed by another bloke with a camera.......... then guess what? Yep, another frigging bloke with a camera. The whole bus was filled with media people and not a single yellow rosette in sight.



It gradually dawned upon me that he wasn't there but, using my powers of detection (OK, the space behind the bus was surrounded by cameramen) I realised that he was arriving in somewhat more salubrious transport. Suddenly he was here! The car swept up and he arrived to a chorus of cheers and assorted comments from the more aged residents of Eastbourne e.g. 'Is it Churchill?', 'Do I live here?' and 'Some bastard has nicked me Werthers.'

He climbed on a small podium and proceeded to make a speech, which, courtesy of the converted Dansette Junior record player sound system was audible, even up in my eyrie. He really must know that speech quite well as it was exactly the same as the one I saw on TV the other day but that's modern politics for you - forget policies, let's just get some really good sound bites.

The leader of the Lib Dems gazes in awe at a signed photograph of Bertie Bassett

He sounded sincere and the poor bloke must be totally knackered by now but I was a little upset that, when he answered questions afterwards and waved to the crowd, he did not appear to once turn to those loyal placard bearers behind him and acknowledge them. Presumably he is sure of their vote so no need to waste energy on them? Yes, I AM cynical and NO I won't be voting. It was still quite interesting to see something a little different.




As for my birthday girl, she has spent the whole day semi-asleep on the couch with a really bad sickness bug so, as birthdays go, it wasn't the best. It's my son's birthday Friday so I think a special double celebration next week is in order. By that time, we'll have a new Government - Plus ça change (plus c'est la même chose)