The Man from Del Monté says Wii

I've got yet another new toy!

Due to the combination of 9 month's non-smoking, laziness, boredom and sheer gluttony my body has taken on the appearance of Buddha as viewed by one of those distorting mirrors you used to get on all the best seaside piers. Oh those were the days - a penny in the What the Butler Saw (with a delicious frisson of guilt as you saw those knee-length drawers), the glass animal man, a few machines and all the stalls. Nowadays, it's the mega-decibel clatter of mindless machines and a cornucopeia of ways to relieve you of as much money in as short a time as possible.


I digress as usual so back to the toy: it's a Wii, complete with Wii Fit and it's going to turn me into the god-like figure that I know is hidden (fairly deeply) inside the layers of muscle cunningly disguised as fat. My GP said he has one so it was justified as a medical need and I was quite excited as it told me it would keep track of progress and help me turn into the new Wii Mii. It asked my age, height, weight and got me to do a few tests and told me my physical age was actually 5 years younger than the bitter reality. Result!! All one apparently has to do is leap on the thing and do a few balance tests and the years drop off. At this rate, I thought, in a week or two I'd be 21 again.

I started a few exercises. 2 minutes virtual hula-hooping was a bit interesting and I suddenly realised the room was getting hotter, then it got me to do a short jog and I realised that, whilst it was a great piece of kit, a sports bra should have been included. Anyway, cutting a long story short, 60 minutes later I was a sodden wreck but I had tightrope walked, tried step aerobics, totally failed at yoga and become rated as "professional" at skiing.

Next day, I took my aching body to check how many years as well as stone I had lost. It welcomed me back and got me to do another Wii Fit age test. Seventy frigging nine!!! Stupid, STUPID machine. I took solace in some 10 pin bowling and was starting to feel a bit better about life until my son arrived and proceeded to get 7 strikes in a row. Anyway, the challenge is now on and, if nothing else, the Wii has succeeded in me seeing much more of Master Bassett as he seeks to avenge the many years of playing second fiddle to the alpha Bassett. So far, I am baseball and golf champion as well as whuppin' his ass at advanced hula hooping - we'll conveniently forget all the other disciplines!


If you are listening to the music on here it's the title track to the new Neil Young album, Fork in the Road (the cover is rubbish so here's a picture I prepared earlier!). Mr Young's album output has been prodiguous to say the least during his career with, I understand, 48 released thus far.Add to that his Buffalo Springfield, CSNY and other occasional get-together albums and it's about 80 altogether. This latest album was typical Young insofar as it was written and thrown together in 2 recording sessions in the middle of a long tour. Why the hurry? Because NY had a bee in his bonnet about the motor car industry and needed to express his protest.

Neil Young has always been a man of conscience espousing such things as Farm Aid, anti-war protest and the environment. Sadly, the age of protest singers is perceived to belong to the bygone era era of Joan Baez, Dylan, Lennon, Seeger etc - a spin-off of the hippy '60s. There are undoubtedly still songs expressing protest with REM, Springsteen, Green Day, Eminem and Pearl Jam all contributing but Young still seems to carry the conscience of a nation upon his shoulders at times. The new album may be a bit raw and a tad crude around the edges but I think it's back to Young at his stirred-up best. I admire the man but I can't say I enjoy all of his music. More often than not, the whimsical country stuff is not for me.The fact remains though that he is still exploring his talent and his craft. Hearing him with his old simple rock style once more, is superb. Feeling the passion in his work is a privilege.

I'm still trying to improve my PhotoShop skills and thoroughly enjoying the creativity it gives me. Speaking as someone who can't draw a straight line, it allows me a freedom to play without the skill of an artist. Prawn Cocktail is very Daliesque although I didn't consciously make it so and God alone knows from where The Glorious Twelfth came? The Taj Mahal as a cake was just a play - nothing more.

I decided I would try and express in Photoshop what I have previously done in my writings i.e. my thoughts, fears influences etc. I had no idea just what would come out but below is the result - it hasn't got a title. Maybe one day I will feel my thoughts deserve one.