Pomp & Circumstance

Now most of my life I've been a bit of a rebel: walking on the cracks on the pavement, gaily passing under ladders and even, (just occasionally) not saying Good Morning Mr Magpie, should I see one in solitary splendour. I remember about 30 years ago, as a reasonably senior member of the Inland Revenue in Brighton, strolling in wearing an earring and seeing the looks of shock on the faces of the other Inspectors. It was a small victory against the Establishment and one of many over the years.

I like to be different. People know it's me wandering around the town as nobody else wears a full-length leather coat and black suede stetson hat and I see nothing wrong with asserting one's personality (or should that be eccentricity?).

Having said that, I watched the documentary on BBC1 about the Royal Family and was totally blown away by the whole programme. I know a lot of people who would have us as a Republic; they talk of the money wasted on an outdated, anachronistic and iniquitously inherited aristocracy, they speak of the money wasted in ceremonial matters and the vast upkeep required to keep the Royals in splendour. No doubt they have some valid reasons for their beliefs and, equally, I would probably agree with some of them, but the bottom line is .............I am a staunch Royalist: I always have been and always will be. I can't rationalise it and don't really feel the need to. All I know is that seeing the pomp, the ceremony and the sheer bloody hard work which goes into making our country the envy of the pageantry world makes me pretty damn proud to be a loyal subject of Her Majesty.

I was in awe at the efficiency of the Royal household. If nothing else, it proves that tradition can be useful. The whole well-oiled operation; whether it be visiting dignitaries, investitures or just plain everyday Court duties is based on precedent and an incredibly organised machine. One can only imagine at the number of hands shaken over Betty's reign, the endless speeches given and listened to, meaningless conversations and ceremonies and the knowledge that her every move is watched. Even worse, her every public move is choreographed. No popping out for a quick 30 minutes, no throwing a sickie - just a life of total duty. It's the same with a lot of the other Royals (and I know the argument about so do a lot of other people).

They were born into a life not of their own choosing, a destiny to which their choice has not been taken into account. The argument that they live a life of luxury doesn't hold water with me - I certainly wouldn't trade places (apart from the getting into footie matches free). Sitting down to nice meals is great but I'd rather do it with friends and not with 200 people I don't know. Going to watch a gig is great but sitting through a Royal Variety performance? I think not! Even having everybody watching their Ps and Qs all the time rather than just enjoying a social moment is enough to put me off.

There are plenty of valid arguments both for and against the Monarchy but it boils down to one thing for me - I get a real thrill and pride watching the pageantry and revelling in the tradition. I remember in my Foreign Office days, sitting at a window in Whitehall watching the State procession when Emperor Hirohito visited London. Sheer magic. I've been lucky enough to (in a very small way) be part of the great British tradition and wandered the halls of history. The sheer majesty and splendour of the great London buildings and palaces is awe-inspiring and I would hate to see it all become anything less than a working environment.

Had I pursued my career at the Foreign & Commonwealth Office then, by now, I might be speaking from a position of greater knowledge. However, I shall have to wait a little longer until I get the letter from Downing Street informing me of my recognition for services to Queen, Country and the Haribo Corporation.

Until then, I shall still stand proud as the National Anthem is played and raise my glass to the Queen - God bless her!